
Covid and cancer. Two very different things but it’s weird how they both take me back to how I was feeling 6 years ago.
Going through something like cancer really helps when a global pandemic comes along because your forced to do what you’ve already done and that’s isolate. Isolate from the world just like you did when going through chemo, living in your own little bubble, staying away from people, only going out when necessary, wearing a mask, sanitising everything constantly. Everything they are recommending now. I’ve seen people on social media moan about how they just don’t think they are going to be able to stay at home for weeks and I get it, it’s boring as hell but I and many cancer patients did this for months and months even years. My advice: take it day by day and don’t get too overwhelmed. Stay positive and focused. Attitude plays a massive part. Focus on food, sleep, exercise, get outdoors when you can, it’ll make such a difference.
I should have got used to coping with covid by now, it’s been around for a good while but to be honest I still can’t get my head around it and don’t think I will. It’s not something I thought I would see in my lifetime. It’s like you’re in a bubble with no way of getting out, well that’s how I feel about it right now living in the uk.
It’s hard knowing after going through all the years of chemo, and a stem cell transplant that something like a virus could kill me, but it’s not JUST a virus. It’s not easy trying to get over that thought. I mean it’s not like I think about it daily but there’s always reminders. I’ve now got used to not sleeping at night because of fear and anxiety and waking up in the middle of the night emotionally drained. Sometimes there are nights like that and I have accepted that but others I can sleep right through and get a good 10 hours.

As I’m so far out of treatment now I’m only classed as clinically vulnerable and not extremely which was a little upsetting when I first found out from my consultant. I mean its not like I want to be classed as extremely vulnerable but knowing I wouldn’t be able shield from last March was really scary, even after taking all the precautions I can. Right now, I am on furlough as the company I work for is classed as non-essesntial and thankfully gave me a choice but I know others aren’t so fortunate and I feel so grateful that I can now shield at home for the foreseeable.
I didn’t think when I was lying in my hospital bed 6 years ago that now I would be fearing for my health once again. Fearing if I did catch covid would my body be able to handle it. I don’t want to think that I wouldn’t be able to handle covid but I know my body and my health has taken a battering over the past few years although saying that I am SO grateful for my health as I know there are others going through a lot worse.
It’s not easy living as a cancer survivor during a global pandemic, the feelings that it brings back and the memories that I would like to forget about and the late nights not being able to sleep but I am coping as well as I can. I know a lot of people are finding this lockdown harder than the others mental health wise and I can totally relate but this won’t last forever even if right now it feels like it will.

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Hello Samantha, thank you for sharing your feelings with us as a cancer survivor. This is a touchy post,this also got me to think that we should be greatful of the good health we have there are people going through the worst out there. May you be safe through it all.
Hi Aphilla! thank you so much for reading, lovely. Oh god yes. I couldn’t be more grateful for my health right now 🤍 hope your staying as safe as possible x
AW! Samantha, this was such a raw and open post. I’m sorry that this brought back really sensitive memories. I hope you’re hanging in there and that we’ll soon be able to see loved ones/friends and be on regular work routines. I was laid off last August and I’ve been home since. I never saw the point in risking myself and/or others but often saw people still getting together. Thanks for sharing x
http://www.lynnmumbingmejia.com
thank you so much for reading, Lynn 🤎 I’m missing my family so much right now, honestly can’t wait for the moment I can hug them all. Oh I’m sorry you were laid off, that sucks but glad your keeping safe x
Wow! This is such an eye-opening read. Thank you so much for sharing something so personal. I’m so sorry that it has brought back some painful memories, but I do hope you’re staying as safe as possible. Thank you again for sharing!
Thank you so much, Alisha! 🤍
Thank you so much for having the courage to share this with us. Covid has definitely made me grateful for what I have in life and the importance of being in good health even though that pales in comparison to what you have gone through. Thank you for being so inspiring as well & congrats on being a survivor 🙂
http://thesydneysider.com/
Thank you so so much, Clarissa! I do feel so grateful now that I’m over my treatment and back into some what normal health, there’s no feeling like it. Awh, this is so lovely! x
Thank you for sharing this. I hope more people are able to think how you do. Staying home if you have good health should be appreciated. My Dad was diagnosed with cancer when I graduated high school, and I was away at college for the majority of his difficult treatment periods. I know my parents’ shielded me from how bad things were, but my Dad has always said that having a good mindset while going through treatment is what kept him alive, even now. Thank you again for being brave and sharing this, and congratulations on winning your fight!
Oh definitely. Oh god yeah, your mindset is everything! Even when I was going through my bad days on treatment I knew there was somebody going through worse which made me so grateful I was strong enough to be able to go through something like chemo. I hope your dad is doing good now! Thank you so much, Alison! x
Thank you for sharing your perspective, as this was such a honest post. I really enjoyed reading. My grandparents were both diagnosed with cancer during COVID-19 period, and one is still going through chemo but previous to this I didn’t have much experience in what it was like as a patient so this was enlightening. Congratulations on being a survivor!
Paige
Oh god. How awful for you and your family to go through something like cancer and covid at the same time. I hope they are both doing well! Sending love 🤍 Thank you so much, Paige x
This post is so moving & resonates with me because I have a family member who battled cancer & is still battling the repercussions. i felt like everyone got to experience what it’s like to have to isolate – be in someone else’s shoes so to speak. i’m sure people will read this and feel just as empowered as I felt.
keep being strong! you are an inspiration.
Thank you so much, this really means a lot! I can’t explain how hard it is to isolate yourself because of having cancer in the past. I struggle so much with it but I’m so glad people are resonating with this, it really helps me feel I’m not alone in my thoughts x