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  1. I love this post so much, you’re right it’s so hard to know what to say and what not to say, but this will give people a better understanding xx

  2. I needed to read this. Just last week we go the awful news that my husband has cancer. We only lost his mum 18 months ago to cancer so It was a massive, raw shock. I was literally sitting here yesterday thinking I wish I knew what he will need from me, his treatment starts next week. Would love to know what you needed from your family? We have already heard some of the above, so I totally agree with you how some of these can make you eyeroll lol xx

  3. Honestly I feel like it is really hard to talk to person who is going through such a terrible time, I feel like there is nothing you can say or do to make it better. Unless you been through that, you don’t really know what to say to make it a little bit better. xx

  4. This is really helpful and eye opening, feel like these are some of the classic go-to things that people say. I feel like myself I wouldn’t know the best thing to say either, this is a very informative post xx

  5. This is such an interesting post and im glad youve published it. I think its hard to know what to say unless you’ve been there yourself, what we think maybe the right thibg to say is sometimes not and what is worse is of those kind words we think we are saying don’t actually help. thank you for sharing and giving us some insight 😊 x

    • I think it’s good to listen but when people just sit there quiet it’s really awkward and as you say doesn’t help at all. I’m hoping my post will help though 💕 Thanks for your comment, lovely xo

  6. I’m actually astonished to see what kind of things people would say, like HOW did it seem good to say something like “I know someone who died from what you have” or ask about something futile like your weight ? Of course it’s hard to know what to say, I would have no Idea myself, but gosh some of those sound kind of mean 😕

    • Right?! I think it’s so hard for people to know what to say and I was so shocked when people actually said these things to me. I’m so glad I wrote this post though so hopefully people can understand more xo

  7. Total agree “I don’t know what to say”. Question for you – if someone doesn’t know what to say would it be wrong to say to do want to hear my mundane news i.e. books just to have a conversation. Know would take anyone’s mind off of what they going through but might make them feel connected for a minute. ? ?

    • Okay, so I think this is a great question and to be totally honest I would have loved for someone to say that because I was always in the cancer world and to talk about something completely unrelated would have been great. Sometimes it’s good just to talk about normal things when going through treatment as you say it takes their mind off everything! Thank you so much for your comment xo

  8. Im so glad you have posted this ,Ive been fighting since 2013 .Ive got a rare non hodkins lympoma and at first I was on watch and wait I was told of family and friends I have a good Cancer ! Really !! Its got worse over the years and had lots of side affects along tbe way had a stem cell transplant in may this year fingers crossed my cancer is at bay its incurable but can be kept at bay .Another side affect feom the chemo is i now have ansvascular necrosis what is basically the chemo has stopped my blood supply going to my hip joints so the balls in both hip joints are now dead .The pain is awful cant walk feel a invalid im 3y years old but hey least im still here .The most dissapointing thing for me has been my support network at first in 2013 everyone was there now have hand fuls of people that are there take me to appointments etc it seems as the cancer has got worse people have scurried off ! My mum passed a year since being djagnoised .never had nothing to do with my birth dad .she has 3 sisters not one of them have been there one sends the odd thinking of you if i put a status on facebook thats it its so frustrating !Im such a bubbly smiley person I dont say nothing but now im struggling keep It in Im feeling really bitter and I dont want to be that person .Im so lucky I have my partner Tony hes my soulmate my rock hes just amazing His mum and dad also are his dad trys to take me on all my appointments and barbara is just lovely .my son Josh trys to help all he can and stayed over loads when I had my transplant hes just moved to Derby starting Uni ,thats anither emotional thing .I have the best cousin Jemma who I really do not no how I would have got through this she been there 110 percente .Also all my other friends they all been fantastic to many to mention but they no who they are ….Sorry jump on your post hun It was like kepad diaharia lol xxx would be nice to be in touch with you xx

  9. gaad, sometimes people can be so insensitive can’t they?! but i think it usually stems from a place of misunderstanding, if you haven’t had cancer yourself then you can’t even comprehend how harsh the reality really is.

    a colleague of mine recently got diagnosed with cancer, and this was a really great reminder to avoid the cliche comments and just love and support him as best i can. thanks girlie x

    katie. xx lacoconoire.com

  10. Have heard most of them ..lost hubby 4 years ago , and am fighting my own battle. .at least they’re saying something. .I quite often suffer from my own dose of foot in mouth 😃

  11. I think this is such an amazing post. I actually made me laugh at points aha. I know its not the same thing but when I was suffering with depression or have a bad day I often get annoyed at the “how are you feeling today” comment. I feel like if I was having a good day that just reminds me of the bad days. Which is annoying.

    I think this is a really important post to share too.

    Much love
    Holly
    http://heyitsok.co.uk

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